Acceptance

Last week, Penny’s teacher sent home a “Star of the Week” book where all the children in her class wrote something they liked about Penny and drew a picture to go along with it. As I turned each page and I cried (because that’s what I do), my heart grew 10 sizes. The children wrote things like, “she’s funny, she’s kind, she helps me, she likes to giggle, I like donuts like Penny, we’re all the same”. In the drawings, most of the kids had drawn Penny’s signature red earphones which she wears to school or when it gets too loud.

I’d like to think I’m not that old (I turned 32 last week but still feel 18 until my back starts acting up) but I do not remember doing anything like that for my classmates when I was younger – and I attended several different schools. Especially any classmates that were neurodiverse.

It just really reminded me that as much as I feared my kids not fitting in or having a hard time, that most people are really very kind, and it’s so nice that they’re being taught that from such a young age.

My favourite entry in Penny’s book was from a little girl who Penny plays with often. I had a big fear that it was sort of a “pity friendship” when I learned she had a friend last year, which I know sounds terrible, but I checked with the staff just to ensure that they were actually friends and that it wasn’t a caretaker-type relationship. They’ve all assured me they’re actually friends and really enjoy each others company. As soon as we got the book I searched for her entry.

She wrote, “Penny is nice. She is pretty. I play with her a lot. She is my best friend. She is friendly to me. She is kind. She helps me a lot. That is why I like Penny.” (This is edited for clarity because the spelling errors were adorably 7 years old)

How cute is that?! I mean, really. I’ve lost sleep that the kids – who I know are the sweetest, funniest, friendliest little humans – won’t make any friends, and at 7 years old Penny has not just one best friend, but several friends she plays with daily. Penny can talk but only in spurts and mostly through Echolalia, she visibly stims often, and she plays a bit differently than her peers, but she is out there making friends left right and centre and the kids just accept her as she is which is incredible.

The other day my nephew and niece were over for my birthday cupcakes, and we sent them outside in the backyard with Rory for a little bit. You could see them legitimately trying to play with him. My nephew, who is also 7 like Penny, came inside and told my sister/his mom “Even though Rory has Autism, he really likes it when I do this. He laughs a lot” and then showed her how he goes down the slide.

I love that a 7 year old can recognize that although Rory may not play just like him, he can alter the way he plays to engage with Rory. I’m sure he probably wouldn’t know that’s what he’s doing if I told him, but he knows it as second nature which is amazing.

Before everything shut down last year, I also attended a few birthday parties where some of Rory’s daycare friends were so delighted to see him, and the parents said, “this must be the infamous Rory. *insert name* talks about him all the time!”

Kids just seem so much kinder these day. I know they’re only young yet (5 and 7) but I’m going to appreciate the kindness that I see surrounding them as it happens.

Although, I swear, at the first sign of a bully I’m going to lose my shit hahaha